We’ve seen it in the news lately. The CDC is getting into the act. The city of Leicester, England, was rocked by protest when it admitted it had no plan for dealing with it. It’s good to see that government is finally taking the inevitable zombie apocalypse seriously.

But let’s face it: When it goes down, we all know the government’s going down with it. If you’re going to survive the zombie hordes, you’re going to have to do it by your own wits. And that means you need a plan. Forget the CDC, forget the Leicester city council. You wanna live? You gotta do it yourself.

So what’s your big plan? Hide out in an old farmhouse? How about a shopping mall? A pub named after an ancient capital of England but ironically taking an iconic American firearm as its mascot? Yeah, we all know how well those places worked out.

No, you need a real fortification. Something you can put together quickly and easily, but which can hold back wave after wave of the undead. Forget what you know about military defense (’cause we all know how well the military’s gonna fare); the walking dead are a very different sort of foe. Tenacious. Unending. Unnervingly tough. But fortunately not long on strategy. The right kind of fortification is easy to build and to hold, but ideal for keeping the zombie waves at bay.

So here’s your plan. It won’t get you through the first night—that’s a topic for another day—but if you find yourself still on your feet a few days into it, gather a few fellow survivors and put one of these together. You’ll need a hilltop, a nearby Home Depot, and half a dozen hard workers. But when you’re done, you’ll have a sanctum that should give you a safe place to hole up for the long haul.

Click through for a poster-sized PDF.

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